Like so many of you (I presume!), I’ve been heartbroken and outraged while reading and listening to news reports all week about the Trump administration’s new “zero tolerance” immigration policy that calls for separating incoming migrant children from their parents. There was the glimpse inside the Casa Padre facility that’s been housing detained children inside a former Walmart. Then the announcement that the administration will erect tent cities to house more migrant children. And then there was Jeff Sessions’ use of a Bible verse to try and justify these actions.
If you’ve been trying to figure out what you can do about all of this, here are some suggestions for specific actions you can take.
Today, the president is speaking at a roundtable discussion on immigration, where his signature overt racism will surely be on full display. That racism isn't just a Trump thing—it's been part of the discussion on "illegal immigration" for decades.
When did we start calling people “illegal” Anyway?
Aside from the fact that this policy of separating children and parents is so completely unconscionable, I have also been cringing every time I hear an administration official or spokesperson use the term “illegal immigrants.” Which is why I was really grateful to see this video from Racist History on my Facebook timeline looking back to when we first started using the term “illegal” to describe human beings immigrating to the U.S. It’s only 3 minutes long and worth watching to better understand where we’ve gone wrong with immigration.
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Point Made Learning team members showing how you do productive dialogue!
Come holiday season, we often brace ourselves as we prepare to step outside of our bubbles and break bread with friends and relatives whose beliefs we find… problematic. This year, we’re seeing this as an opportunity to engage in and model productive dialogue.
Doing this with loved ones can be even harder than doing it with the rest of the world. So, we can think of it as training. [tweetshareinline tweet=”We’re not going to bite our tongues just for the sake of keeping things even-Steven at the dinner table.” username=”PM_Learn”]
If you want to give this a try, we’ve got a few tactics we rely on when we facilitate our workshops. These Guiding Principles help in everyday conversations, too.
And we’re not the only ones who have this on our minds this week. So we’re also providing you with a few resources we’ve come across from some of the writers and organizations we continue to learn from.
We hope this helps and feel free to leave a comment if you think we’ve left anything out!
OUR GUIDING PRINCIPLES
Try to avoid the term “racist.”
Or “sexist,” “homophobe,” etc. This is a hard one because one of these might be the exact term to describe whatever comments you’re hearing from your aunt’s new boyfriend (We even have a film with “Racist” in the title!). And these may be so offensive that the only thing you can do is declare, “That’s racist!” And then walk away. BUT… If you’re hoping to make some headway with a family member you really care about, that’s going to stop the conversation. You may feel some temporary self-satisfaction at calling that person out, but it’s not very effective. Instead, try this…
Ask Questions
[tweetshareinline tweet=”Put the responsibility on the other person to explain or justify what they’ve said.” username=”PM_Learn”] This works especially well when someone makes generalizations or stereotypes. These will usually fall apart with just a few critical questions like:
“What makes you say that?”
“When you say, ‘they all…’, who is ‘they’?”
“What in your experience has given you that opinion?”
“Can you tell me a little more about why you said that?”
And if you can muster all your energy to ask these questions with a tone of curiosity, instead of judgment or disgust, they will work that much better. Look, we didn’t say this would be easy!
Don’t try to win an argument.
If, at Thanksgiving dinner, your Uncle Bob has just declared that all men are under attack in the workplace in the midst of all these sexual harassment and assault allegations in the news, you’re probably not going to convince him otherwise that particular evening. Nor will you be able to teach him about the history and continued prevalence of sexism, misogyny, and toxic masculinity. So, again, if your intention is to be effective, then start out slowly. Meet him where he is. And ask questions.
When I hear comments like that, I usually try something like, “Interesting (it works to say something validating first!). I’ve heard that perspective, but I don’t quite understand why men would feel that way. Can you help me understand your point?”
Then, “Ok, thanks for that. I have a different take on it. Are you open to hearing an alternative perspective?”
If he says, “Sure,” then you get a turn!
If he says, “No.” Well, then, don’t waste your breath and go pour yourself another glass of wine or have a second helping of pie. You’ll have earned it – you didn’t let the offensive comments go unchecked and you maintained your sanity.
Here’s one other thing I make sure to do in these instances: If my kids have had to hear anything ignorant or offensive, I take some time to have a longer conversation with them.
Repeat the other person’s point.
If you do find yourself engaged in a heated discussion or full-blown argument, you’ll probably feel like the other person isn’t really hearing you (they’ll feel the same way about you, by the way). As a last-ditch effort, try stating the other person’s point in your own words: “Ok, I want to make sure I understand your point. I think what you’re saying is…” Give them time to clarify. Then ask them if they can do the same for you. You will likely both still disagree with one another in that moment, but there’s always a chance that later, when they are on their own and not trying to double down or save face in front of other people (in other words, protecting their ego), you may have planted a seed in their minds.
OK, that’s it – these are the four principles we try to rely on when trying to have productive conversations. Now here are some other resources we’ve found to be really helpful…
“When a tough topic comes up around a table of friends and family, it’s all too easy to take a deep breath and hold it in. Instead of staring down a contentious cousin, it might feel safer to stare at your phone, just to avoid that political debate you’re dreading. But civility and conversation can lead to better relationships, greater creativity and boost the economy.”
Our friends at Border Crossers put together this list of books, lessons, videos, and more. Incredible resource for educators and parents who are ready to rear children through a justice lens.
This article from columnist Sharon Salzberg, an author and meditation teacher, will help you find some calm and grounding as you engage in discussions.
Since the release of the documentary film I’m Not Racist… Am I?, Point Made Learning (PML) has held more than 400 screenings and workshops across the United States. Facilitated by senior members of our staff, these events engage diverse audiences and help communities think, learn, and – most importantly – talk about race and racism in ways they don’t often get a chance to do.
Some of our events involve a screening of the 90-minute film, followed by a 30-minute Q&A. Sometimes we get a chance to go a lot deeper, when organizers make a commitment to plan a series of events that engage every segment of their city over the course of several days. It takes a ton of work to make that happen, but the impact can be far-reaching and significant.
For those of you thinking about hosting your own I’m Not Racist… Am I? screenings and workshops, we think that reading about what other groups have done might be helpful in your planning process. We’ve reached out to a few of the people who have been instrumental in some of our larger programs across the U.S. and asked them to talk about what went into planning and executing, what worked/what didn’t, and what they wish they’d known.
Keep reading to learn about our May 2017 programming in Des Moines, Iowa.
Iowa Public Radio interviews Catherine Wigginton-Greene, director of “I’m Not Racist… Am I?”
This past May, a number of community groups collaborated with Point Made Learning to bring I’m Not Racist… Am I? (INRAI) to Des Moines, Iowa. There, partnerships forged between church groups, high schools and Drake University made it possible for the film to screen three different times — twice at local high schools, and once at the Drake University auditorium. Among the audiences who watched the film were the faculty from every Des Moines area high school (approximately 600 teachers total), high school and college students, and community members interested in deepening the conversation about race and racism.
One of the screenings’ primary organizers, Sheena Thomas, got involved when members of Des Moines’ Anti-Racism Collaborative reached out to her because they were all part of a multi-church network called AMOS (A Mid-Iowa Organizing Strategy). Thomas was able to secure grant money to fund the screenings, and she was able to recruit local stakeholders to join in the planning process.
For the Des Moines community, screening the film was about more than hosting a neighborhood movie night; the organizers intended for INRAI to help people tackle difficult issues that affect many groups in their area. For example, Thomas said, the local high schools have a major issue with out-of-school suspensions and the “School to Prison Pipeline” that primarily affects minority populations.
“That is a huge problem here,” said Thomas. “Iowa has one of the highest incarceration rates for minorities in the pipeline … so there is a lot of work to be done here, and that was a rationale for bringing this in to the schools.”
According to Thomas, many people “just don’t get” why issues of race and racism are so important. “They don’t have to live with it in any way, shape or form,” she said, “so it’s hard to get them to understand, to see things differently, from another perspective.”
Like the stone Sisyphus was pushing up the hill over and over, the issues of racism and white privilege will not go away without more and more education.
Films like INRAI are a major aid in reaching those people and helping them find the alternative perspectives of which Thomas speaks. She said, “The films generated enough discussion and provocation that people were still discussing it long after the showing, and I thought that was really good.” She added that one of the organizers’ goals was “to develop enough sensitivity so that we’d have some leaders who wanted to pursue doing something on the subject,” and that has been the case — after the events, young adults created a Race Education Committee, an adult group formed to discuss these issues, and the Anti-Racism Collaborative held a speaker series for AMOS members to attend.
When asked why hosting events like the INRAI screenings is important, Thomas was direct: “Like the stone Sisyphus was pushing up the hill over and over, the issues of racism and white privilege will not go away without more and more education. That’s why.”
Inside the Planning and Promotion Process
In our discussion with Thomas, she discussed what it took to bring the screenings to life. Here are some of the highlights from our Q&A.
PML: Once you had the idea, what were the steps you took toward making it a reality?
Sheena Thomas: The Anti-Racism Collaborative was very good about saying, ‘Let’s have meetings,” and setting dates, and getting things done before each meeting which needed to be done. We worked on who we were going to market to … then it was working on the marketing and working to get interviews for (PML’s) Catherine Wigginton Greene to do with two TV stations and the public radio station. Also, we had posters that we put up all over for the screenings, around the churches and shop windows, and around Roosevelt High School. And I was able to get a billboard — several billboards — as places for community publicity.
PML: If you could do the process over again, what is one thing you’d do differently?
ST: I would start the public marketing earlier, and it would have been better to have Catherine’s interviews air a little sooner to give people in the public more info and time to plan. Oh, and because I thought we might be overrun or overwhelmed with people attending, I suggested sign-ups online. That may have actually deterred people from coming.
PML: Was there anything that happened which really surprised you? What was it, and why was it surprising?
ST: Getting to know the members of the Anti-Racism Collaborative, the students of the groups at two of the Des Moines High Schools, the faculty and administrators in charge of school climate and their eagerness and thoughtfulness were surprising to me. Also, the total backing we received from staff and foundation at Plymouth Church was amazing. One of the people on the foundation was instrumental in helping us get our marketing done.
PML: Overall, what were the biggest challenges you faced as an organizer? How did you respond to these challenges?
ST: My biggest challenge was working on the organizing in and around my job. There was a lot of emailing that had to be done and which did impinge on my work time at my shop and on my home time as well. I was very grateful for the others who were also organizing on their own.
PML: What advice do you have for other people who want to hold similar events? Say, your top 3 tips…
ST: One: Start early — 9 months before the event was good in our case.
Two: Get buy-in from several groups and collaborate in the planning. And share the costs.
Three: Market like crazy and use the resources offered by Point Made Learning when doing so.
If you are interested in hosting a Point Made Learning film screening or workshop, please send us an email: programming@pointmade.com
Also, check out our new I’m Not Racist… Am I? Digital Online Course — a valuable program for corporations and individuals who want to Look Deeper into race, racism, and bias.
Point Made Learning is the consulting and programming extension of Point Made Films, a production company focused on telling stories about the many layers of American identity. We use documentary film to facilitate productive discussions around the most uncomfortable topics we face in American society – starting with racism. We’ve taken an innovative approach to raising awareness and organizing communities through our unique combination of storytelling, real talk, and digital tools. We tell true stories and teach powerful lessons about issues that matter.
The American Dream Life-Size Game features 12 different “characters” from diverse racial and socioeconomic demographics and backgrounds. The characters roll giant dice and advance along the game board to try and reach “success” — but there’s a catch: After each player’s turn, a facilitator reads a Chance Card aloud. Taken from real life scenarios, each card affects one or more groups in society differently than others, and some players have to move back spaces or lose turns, while others take extra steps ahead. The idea is to give players a sense of how the path toward achieving the American Dream is easier for some than others.
On WeWork Penn Station’s “community floor,” we rolled out the giant life-size American Dream game floor board and invited WeWork members to play. Point Made’s Catherine Wigginton Greene and Lenny Walker took the lead in hosting the game, and helping guide the ongoing discussions among players. Two different groups played the game during the 2+ hour event, but they were far from the only people involved; the majority of the spectators assembled for the Happy Hour received hand-out “fans” which assigned audience members to be on the same team as one of the characters in the game. By the end of the night, everyone had learned something — and they had a good time doing it.
Rave Reviews
The people who played the American Dream game had nothing but positive things to say about it, as did those who set up the event.
“It actually made me think about things from someone else’s perspective, things I wouldn’t have thought of before,” said Pepper Jefferson, a WeWork member who played the game as the character Isabella — a woman who has emigrated from Mexico to the U.S.
“It’s weird because, for the first time, I really did experience my privilege as a U.S. citizen,” Jefferson said. “And it’s sad, because in real life, so many people know that they’re not going to be able to attain the American Dream because there’s so many setbacks.”
Taurean Casey played the game as well, and he felt it did a great job of delving into controversial topics without making people feel judged, attacked, or afraid to speak freely. He also said the game increased the players’ self-awareness:
“It’s so deep and so real that you are forced to question some of your own viewpoints.”
Casey said that role-playing as one of the characters helps players develop “a sense of self” with that character, “so when you’re going through the game, it’s easier to identify with the real-life version of that character, what that person might go through, and to gain an understanding of how people are affected by things they have no control over.” He added:
[tweetshareinline tweet=”It was one of the easiest experiences that I’ve had to deal with such difficult topics.” username=”PM_Learn”]
And, according to Bianca Rae Hernandez, WeWork Penn Station’s Front Desk Associate who helped organize the activities, “It was super collaborative, and it was great to see that people wanted to participate.” Hernandez called PML’s team members “humble, amazing people to work with.” (No arguments here!)
Jefferson said she “would recommend The American Dream game to everyone, older and younger, because it really is fun.”
And, Hernandez added, “It was a great event. We would definitely do it again, hands-down.”
If you are interested in scheduling your own American Dream experience, send us an email: programming@pointmade.com
Point Made Learning is the consulting and programming extension of Point Made Films, a production company focused on telling stories about the many layers of American identity. We use documentary film to facilitate productive discussions around the most uncomfortable topics we face in American society – starting with racism. We’ve taken an innovative approach to raising awareness and organizing communities through our unique combination of storytelling, real talk, and digital tools. We tell true stories and teach powerful lessons about issues that matter.
This fall, after three years and more than 300 – and counting – I’m Not Racist… Am I? live screenings around the country, we are launching INRAI Digital, an online course built around the film and all the lessons we’ve learned on the road with it.
This fall, after three years and more than 300 – and counting – I’m Not Racist… Am I? live screenings around the country, we are launching INRAI Digital, an online course built around the film and all the lessons we’ve learned on the road with it.
This program is for companies wanting to provide their employees with an engaging way to develop a deeper understanding of racial equity and inclusion – in a judgment-free, private learning experience that can be done at their own pace.
Highlights include:
Three hours of content in eight learning modules, featuring segments of the documentary, along with lessons, quizzes, and reflection exercises.
Stories of young people going through a learning process that will inspire users to approach lessons on race and racism with a growth mindset, rather than being told what to do and what to say by “talking head” experts.
Compelling narrative thread throughout the course keeps users engaged – [tweetshareinline tweet=”this is the type of diversity training they’ll want to do.” username=”PM_Learn”]
We’ll say up front that this program isn’t for everyone. It takes people beyond the edge of their comfort zone and we believe that, at this point, only companies and organizations really looking for something innovative and out-of-the-box will be interested.
But if you think your colleagues working on diversity and inclusion might be interested in learning more, watch the three-minute video below that describes the course. And then contact us for a free demo.
Last May, an incredible group of activists, educators, community leaders, and just all-around good people in Des Moines, Iowa organized a series of events centered around I’m Not Racist… Am I?
I went to college in Cedar Rapids, Iowa (Go Coe College KoHawks!), so I was thrilled to return to the state to screen the film and facilitate discussions about race and racism (another blog post is coming soon with details on how to organize in your city).
For now, I’m excited to share Charity Nebbe interviewing me on her show, Talk of Iowa, on Iowa Public Radio. This was such a great opportunity to delve deeper into the film’s content – something we don’t often get to do. Plus, after the first 30 minutes with me, Ms. Nebbe interviewed local students and educators to find out how the film’s content is directly relevant to their everyday lives in Iowa.
